I don’t know if I have mentioned this before, but I live in a rural area. The country. The suburbs outside of the suburbs. Middle of nowhere. Or, as I call it, the boonies. I’m four and a half miles from the nearest gas station, five miles from a grocery store, eight miles from Target, and ten miles from Wal-Mart. When you live in the boonies, you live with rednecks, and their love for beer, Confederate flags and electric airsoft guns. It’s okay though: so long as you stay off their property and keep your hands off their trucks, wives and dogs, it’s all good!

3:09am